Being More Curious

Today, I attended another funeral. Attending memorial events is something that seems to be becoming normal for me. Because my friends and family members are getting up in age, many of them are leaving the world we know and moving on to whatever is next for us.


No, this is not a blog about what is next for us but rather about how little we know about people.
A year ago, I lost a man who was like a father to me. He was my mother’s twin sister’s husband and was my date for daughter/daddy dances back when I was in elementary school. I spent many hours in his house, car, and at events with him. He was my 6’7” guardian angel. He threatened to take my husband out if he was not good to me when we got married and advised me on how to take care of my car. I knew I wanted a man who would adore me as much as he loved my aunt. He set a high standard on what I wanted in a husband.


I thought I knew him until I listened to people who talked about him at his funeral. I learned so many amazing things about him and his history. My heart broke that day because I did not know Big H. He had a fantastic childhood, and I wish I got to hear more from him.


Today, I went to another funeral, but this time it was a man I did not know well. I could have gotten to know him better. He was my nieces’ grandfather, and I was with him on many happy occasions. Once again, as I learned more about him during the eulogy, I thought, “I wish I had talked to him about that.” He was a man who was committed to equality and focused on real estate. My son would have loved to hear his thoughts on affordable housing. I just never knew.


Why do I write this? I am writing this because it is a shame that we learn a lot about people only after they are gone. What am I going to take away from this? I will become more curious about people, and I am starting with you. What can I learn about you that might be shared with people when you are no longer around? Let me know now so that we can discuss this.

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